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Brexit: A Sorry State Of Affairs

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What is happening in Britain right now is astounding! Never, never did I imagine I would be witnessing such a sorry state of affairs in this country. Such confusion and scrambling, an utter lack of planning and preparation — it’s shocking, disgraceful, tragicomic. It’s like an England football match, only worse, lasting way more than ninety minutes, in fact it will keep playing out for who knows how long. Everybody’s running around like headless chickens trying to stay ahead of a curve so far away from them, it’s almost funny, only it’s Fawlty Towers inane, make that appalling, devastating. Trillions of pounds in wealth vaporized overnight with no fallback plan, no strategy or contingency plan on how to deal with the situation. Just the vapors of bluster and noble-sounding claptrap.

In fact, if you pay close attention, there’s a whiff of American tomfoolery in the air, proud talk about ‘our great nation’ and ‘this great democracy’ etc mixed with Balkan-style unruliness and scrapping, lots of scrapping, and a hint of Middle Eastern disorganization, and a touch of island paranoia, and a dose of hyperborean delusion. What the fuck is happening? The worst of all worlds. Half the country wants a revote, a third is experiencing buyer’s/voter’s remorse, the rest want to either scrap the referendum or act on it immediately, starting with the expulsion of whoever looks like a ‘bloody refugee or immigrant’ and moving on to anyone who’s not a patriot.

London, which voted to stay in Europe, stands alone among the England counties. A tiny area of yellow Remain in an ocean of blue Leave, it’s wondering how it got surrounded by backwardness and bigotry, while the surrounding England and Wales counties regard London and Scotland and Northern Ireland as rich decadent twat-lands. Towns in the countryside receiving EU major funding voted Leave only to then file motions for their funding to be guaranteed. The youth are livid with the old, the old are preaching to the choir, trying to convince themselves they did the right thing, while political leaders and their parties are steeped in chaos and infighting with no plan in sight, none whatsoever.

Meanwhile, across Europe, Greece is laughing out loud from the stretches of its blue-golden beaches and isles, thinking ‘At least we were broke and desperate. These guys are fucking morons!’

And the Americans are happy to see a people masturbating themselves silly over super-democracy and national pride,

and Putin is getting a small boner,

and the Chinese Communist Party are shaking their heads,

and the German administration and their Eurocrat enforcers are still not getting the message, pushing and shoving and demanding compliance until everyone abandons them, everyone apart from their vassals and yes-mannequins, shrinking the union down to the size of a raisin, if not a chicken bone in the sun.

It’s a great day for comedy and drama, but a sad, sad day for Britain, Europe, and the West in general.

From your chorus-driven Spin Doctor,

Keep calm and panic.