Someone once said that pain is an excellent source of creativity. He was right. But so is hunger, obsession, respect (or lack thereof), and the pleasure of making things happen.
Unconditional love. It’s the new fad. The new mantra. Religions preach it. Parents teach it. Psychology advertises it. Disney sells it and kids buy it. And adults too. Everyone gobbles it up because it is what good, righteous people do: love unconditionally.
Unconditional love doesn’t exist. A predicate is always involved.
But it’s a load of bull.
See, unconditional love is by default a misnomer, a term that makes no sense. To love something there has to be a condition, a reason. No one cares about anything without cause.
We love our parents, for example, because they gave birth to us and are taking care of us.
We love our friends because they make us feel good in times of happiness and offer us a helping hand in times of need.
We love our dog because it’s a kindhearted animal, or because it loves us back.
We love animals in general, because they are pure and precious, life’s own testament to diversity and creativity.
We love nature because it contains the spirit of life. And we love God, or a number of deities, because He/She/It represents order and hope.
We love because a condition enables us to.
So, to put things straight and call them by their name, unconditional love doesn’t exist. A predicate is always involved.
Too Many Kooks Spoil The Food
Mind your own business and harm no one, and come together when the time is right, and good things happen.
Now, as far as the kind of all-encompassing, omnipotent affection people exhibit toward everything and anything, sending their colorful and bubbly vibes to the world, it’s a load of well-intentioned rubbish. I mean, loving everyone must be the most meaningless thing a person can claim to be doing. There is no reason for it, no meaning to it, no purpose for it. It helps no one and inspires nothing, making compassion look kooky.
Ever seen a person smile all day? All frickin’ day? If you have, you already know how creepy it looks…
Ever seen a person smile all day? All frickin’ day? If you have, you already know how creepy it looks and how non-constructive it can become over time.
Same with love. “Loving” everyone and everything unconditionally is top notch weird, defeating its own purpose.
Distance. I wish you plenty of it, between you and people who act like that. Preferably an ocean, or a vacuum, or a hard wall of facts. Reality is too precious to waste on misapplied insight, especially if it claims to be the route to “enlightenment.”
Nonsense, you see. It has a way of taking a mile for every inch you offer it. Never yield a hair’s width to it.
Now that is something worth being unconditional about.
The original article first appeared in Urban Times.